How Realistic Are Our Goals?
Your goals should be as high as you can possibly aim for.
The old addage: "Reach for the sky, fall back to Earth; Reach for the moon, land amongst the stars", is truer than you may know.
Compete Past Your Goals
If you want to make the team, you need to be beating league caliber competition. If you want to be a league champ, you should be beating state caliber competition. If you want to be a state champ, you should be beating national caliber competition.
When you're beating national level competition and winning national tournaments, the rest takes care of itself. No one ever won states when their only goal was to win the league.
This also brings in a parenting lesson. Your kid's goals will be about the same as yours, especially at the beginning of their career. They may not even know that kids wrestle in all parts of the country. They win the league and that's it, they're done. There is so much more competition to look for, and very likely, the league is not even close to what's out there.
Your arms should always be reaching outwards, trying to find and beat the best competition possible. Losing is of no consequence, for you usually learn more from a loss than from a win.
If you find yourself winning the league with ease, you should be wondering where all of the good kids are. They are out there, but you do have to search a bit. That's where state/national level tournaments come in.
At some point in your young career, you should be searching for others that are capable of beating you. That's the only way your flaws will be exposed and you'll be able to improve.
But Pins Are Good, Right?
Yes and no. If you pin someone in 30 seconds, unless it was against a high level opponent, that match was a waste of time. What did you learn from it? You may have plenty of those in your career and you will not remember them.
If you used bad technique and won anyways, you just reinforced the idea of that move working against a good opponent. You just reinforced a bad habit. This makes you backtrack. A lot of wrestlers do this when they constantly cut weight to ensure wins. They always win because they out-size their opponent. What happens when you don't want to cut weight anymore? What happens when everyone has gone through puberty and everyone is fast and strong? You realize just how bad you really are.
You shouldn't be happy after an easy win. You should be unsatisfied that you weren't challenged. Say you go through the league and pinned every kid you wrestled. You just went an entire year without learning anything. You might have gotten worse.
The only matches you do remember, are the ones you faught tooth and nail for and barely won or barely lost. Those are the matches that stick with you. Those are the ones you learn from. Those are the matches that make you better.
Never hide from competition. Instead, seek it.
TL;DR (Too Long, Didn't Read)
Your goals will always be realistic, but they should be as high as you can fathom. Train yourself to never be satisfied. You'll continue to improve and you'll never be bored.